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05:31 pm
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Amsterdam
..was fucking crazy. what an amazing city. full of good people, good food and great entertainment. we stayed in a hostel just on the outside of the red light district and it was so much fun. people from 'all walks of life'; Australians, English, Irish, Scottish, Japanese, Canadian.. everyone was having a good time and there was no pretentiousness about it.
aside from what the city is famous for (Coffeeshop/RLD) the architecture was amazing and the city is wonderful. on the way from schiphol to centraal Station there is some amazing graffiti and not just tags. whole verses from Hemingway and other 'famous' authors. stencils too. i wish i could have snapped a few but my camera wasnt working and my friend didn't want to waste his film on it. sucks. if they've cleared it up by the time i go back i will be bummed out.
the airport is fucking massive, literally must be like 5 miles of land. we had to walk 20 minutes to get to/from arrivals/depatures and we were coming in at gate D16 (Think it goes gate A-G 1-20) absolutely fucking intense. the airport has a shopping center as well (hundreds of shops) just outside.
we flew with british airways which we agree was largely a waste of money when we could have paid much less and got pretty much the same thing. the flight is about 40-45 minutes if that. it takes me longer to get into london somedays.
sadly, there are a lot of tourist traps and its pretty easy to spot them (we knew after, 2 hours maybe?).. there are hundreds of pizza/kebab places which are for the most part a rip off.. 3.40E for a slice of pizza is not cool man. 8.50E for a doner kebab. i would stick to the danish bakeries (5 minutes walk from the centrum area) for sweet/savory stuffs. of course, there is your usual mcdonalds etc which do 0.35E ice creams which will put hunger at bay (the staff call them stoner snacks and apparently no1 item on the menu hahaha)
avoid the gift shops like the plague as well unless you like the cheesy kind of gifts to take home (we shopped around a little and the prices are mostly the same) with that said, i hope my friend enjoys his set of porno playing cards (6.00E... i know i know i know)
more soon. i want to go back so badly. you'd love it. we'd ride bikes and have a blast.
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09:07 pm
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lets talk about panic
what the fuck? seriously, this record is a mess! haha. im sure everyone loves it and i'm just being pretty odd (HURR) by not liking it but damn.
the new 'when the day met the night' is okay at best.
lyrically, it has its moments.
pas de chevel is the best song.
maybe it will grow on further listens [which will be far and few between]
with all this said, it's a definite leap forward for them i think, maybe will earn them a few fans.
can't really say what i was expecting from it, just didnt dig it.
in closing, it doesnt suck, it's good at best.
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12:27 am
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use
compare the 3/1 entry to today and its amazing how different times are now. i definately feel foolish.
i am reading:
alice in wonderland
i am listening to:
tom petty
bai.
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11:43 pm
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the only thing youll ever be good at is juggling
oh you know, the usual.
sitting in a lighthouse looking over a unforgiving sea, its just like the time i watched the movie of my life without me in it all at. 'the greeks didn't write obituaries. when a man died, they asked only one question: did he have passion?' im pretty much two down. everyone loves an underdog. i keep wanting to write about time when i saw a girl shoot down a guys marriage proposal in a coffee shop. except its none of my business. p.s it wasnt me. the background picture is always different to the real story. i dont think you notice me at all. ill read hemingway and you'll throw up the same defense.
albeit, 'irony' is my favourite word. 'i wish i could hate you as much as i hate myself' i wish i wrote that line as much as i feel it. i watched sleepless in seattle for the hell of it last night. why not i asked myself as im falling asleep 20 minutes in. better than two weeks ago worse than two weeks later. none of this makes sense to anyone but me (wouldnt have it any other way)
my mixtape for this while my ipod is out of action:
fairweather - between the trees
fallout boy - short fast and loud
brand new - jaws swimming theme
def, ohio - road signs always look better looking over yr shoulder
emmy the great - mia
men are bastards - elle milano
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11:31 pm
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Make it all disappear..
Calendar for the year so far:
February 9th - Portsmouth
March 13th-16th - Amsterdam
April 1st - Spinned
April 5th - I am 20.
April 17th - Against Me!
Nothing else lined up yet which kinda bums me out. I wanna leave it all behind for summer for a week or two. Lets have that adventure we always talk about. For the past week, I've actually been pretty okay. It's been productive. Laughs have been had. Apart from that (which isn't even that exciting), there's not much happening.
My friend went on a date today to see Sweeney Todd. Stoked for him after his last girlfriend, this one is pretty cool.
Oh and they talked about politics and history, which according to my friend 'is probably pretty boring to me!'
Ah well, at least I'm not a racist!
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10:17 pm
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Admit it!!
Oh you know, just like usual. Except not really. It's been alright actually. Tonight made me swoooooon. Ahhhhhh.
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09:11 pm
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for every box
i tick the boxes 'liar' and 'hypocritical' every chance i get because at the end of the day that's all i'll ever be.
i wish i was invisible as i feel sometimes. i love everything and nothing about myself. everybody loses.
i give up on myself. starting to think im cracking up. you can only put on a fake smile and 'how are you's?' for a little while. its a strange way of thinking. i cant wait for the inevitable downfall. sleeping a little better, you know how it is. i hope i make it through 2008. get over yrself.
playlist
um
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09:19 pm
[Link] | you put the 'art' in heARTbreaker
wrap up warm, this city has a habit of making you tremble
we'll go to the same bars and we'll say the same lines.
'build a better life' means nothing more than 'build a better lie'
today i wasn't even gonna get up.
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10:42 pm
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thanks
for reminding me that at the end of the day not everyone in this world is a completely shitty person. i truly feel you because having them hound on you is fucking wrong.
i hope it works out for you.
oh and me?
still messed up.
xo
Current Location: hello, i'm in delaware
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11:30 pm
[Link] | sometimes 'restore from previous draft' makes me laugh
spend the night staring at the wall and eventually the days all roll into one, midnight becomes the marker of when you try to sleep. eyes grow heavy from ipod light and headphones become attached. should i write myself out of everything? a handmade journal has become the keeper of late night thoughts. i made a promise to myself at the beginning of 2007 that it would be the year of taking a step forward with my eyes closed, making something it, 'taking the ball and running' and i cant believe how much i have wasted it.
so shall we make 2008 much of the same? theres an amazing line in the film serendipity ' The greeks didn't write obituaries. When a man died, they asked only one question: did he have passion?'
did i have passion in 2007? fuck no. will i in 2008? i want to.
i want to look back in a year and be a completely different person for the absolute better. its all on my shoulders.
hey, i cant figure out if this year has taken ten years off my life or not (it has)
WHY SO SERIOUS?
i havent slept for so long that days merge into the next and 'life doesnt always turn out the way you plan'
im better than that, i've been brought up better to know not to give up.
did he have passion?
story of my life.
Current Music: hello im in delaware - city and colour
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10:17 pm
[Link] |
2008
be healthy
xo
Tags: b
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09:58 pm
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baby girl, i'm a blur..
reading the newspapers is a waste of time. who cares how winehouse is killing herself today or what voodoo magic is being used to find missing children. the real news is hidden between a thousand gossip pages and adverts. if you're lucky. its completely annoying that 90% of the real news is drowned in false idols. finding reassurances in old books and new 'promises'. and to do it how we used on xanga ;)
+the fear, the fear, the fear
+on the road
+moby dick
hai
bai!
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09:25 pm
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about fooling those..
yet we cant always have an answer to every question and yes we always stray from our beliefs but we always do it to fit in. these words mean everything and nothing. one chapter closes and another opens. how we justify it is just another footnote.
im always obsessed with looking out at the stars and making sure there still there. when i wake up in the middle of the night, i always check if everyone is okay.
lay your head next to mine and we'll sleep one good sleep tonight.
fall asleep, love, to forget or to dream ... fall asleep to leave this world behind.
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11:39 pm
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The only good story I'm ever gonna tell..
When I was about 13/14, every sunday we (meaning me, dan, rich and aron) used to head down to a bushy/rocky area near dan's house to play manhunt. The bushes were pretty thick and you could jump out on people solid-snake style and scare the shit out of them. This particular sunday it had rained before so everything was a bit dirty and we didnt really play but being the real badasses we were, we soldiered on.
So it's aron and rich's turn to count so me and dan run off like lunatics to hide in our places we though were totally unique (but probably not) this time though, we hid in the same place. i go first, and sudden, my 13 year old mind is transformed. There is a man with his trousers around his waist and a camera in one hand filming two people going at it like rabbits on a rug on the floor. I run out scream and everyone is like 'what? what the hell?' and i'm trying to explain what happened in these two split seconds (making the story like 5 minutes long) and by the time we go back to investigate again, they are long gone with only a rug left as evidence but..
'that rug could be from anywhere'
Only I and 3 other people will know what really happened on that fateful day..
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09:05 pm
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a memento of a london skyline
standing on roofs at night looking out across the horizon kind of makes me feel okay
after a day of barely managing to stay awake. fuck everything as of late.
everything i write down on this journal or on paper feels like im being completely hypocritical.
who cares.
i admire and respect so few.
im still putting on a show, im still over-think, i am ______ (fill in the blank yourself).
i always collected the tokens from the back of cereal packets when i was younger, i always made sure i sent them off with the right stamps and the right amount of tokens. i never got what i want.
chin up eh?
x
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10:28 pm
[Link] |
Post an Entry
today, well.
new defiance, ohio is out.
tooth pain going away. need to book appointment still.
need new glasses plus haircut.
i would also like some new snes games, that'd be nice.
i dont know, i cant really complain to be honest.
bored with myspace. lets go old school [email/lj] hahah
donedonedonedone
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08:31 pm
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...
A couple of years ago my dad went to new york and on his return he was telling me the story of a guy he met in a hotel lobby. This guy had been living illegally in the usa for 10 years - just left his job at 5pm one day to go on holiday, packed his shit together, went off to new york and never came back.
He lives and works just like anyone you'd see walking down a busy street and has to avoid getting arrested or even approached by a police officer. When he gets sick he just has to man up and buy over-the-counter medicine.
Why i'm thinking about this right now, i dont know. The whole thing just strikes me as a pretty ballsy move. Maybe he was just a drunk dude spinning a few lines - who knows. If it is true, I salute you.
That is all for now.
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08:38 pm
[Link] | lately surviving on:
against me!
baseball(album)
coffee
hope
+you
writers block eats me.
this is way too obvious.
playlist for another saturday night:
say anything - thats that (do what we what)
the academy is.. - skeptics and true believers
cap'n jazz - oh messy life
elliott smith - unlucky charm
bouncing souls - the gold song
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11:34 pm
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remind you that memories will fade..
heres a little something. i like it. a bit.
diy batman
the bright lights shine on and you've already made tonight (tonight) something to look forward to you. names and faces pass me as im shuffling through a crowd of a million people. take a seat. hellos and how are you's pass by in flash. its probably too late. ill be damned, youve brought the verbal muscle in yet 'we just arent working' goes in one ear and out the other. who needs perception anyway? ive noticed another table listening in while i'm tuning out of you. i bet shes thinking 'i hope he doesnt turn out like this' and hes thinking 'its probably her fault' and my eyes dart back yours and i cant even see emotion anyway. the clock on the wall is blinking 8s. oh im sorry did you say something?
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10:56 pm
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a b c deeee!
oh boy. today. doesn't even warrant talking about. i did get a little idea today though, might see it in 'production' soon :]
i am seriously contemplating ___________ next year (the blank isnt a bad thing, just 100& confirmed yet - dont wanna ruin it (for me ;))
sososo - spinned is go. hyped as fuck, early days but its more progress than ive done since the 6 months ive had the idea.
cant figure out work at the minute. its been good in a small way. bad in a huge way. learnt alot of people i previously held in somewhat high regard. its definately been interesting. (why have i got split ends!) cliques dont end at school kids, they extend all the way to work and onwards. also, the umbrella academy iss2 is fucking goood. dude knows how to write a story.
plans:
nov-play it cool.
dec-ttoacr no.1
jan-make sure spinned is done properly
feb-tat
mar-undecided..
apr-20
may-holiday.
gonna call it a night, 11:06pm? old man bedtime hahaha
(i like how positive this one was! :)
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